søndag 28. august 2011
My first shaman festival - Isogaisa.
The holy fire
It is funny, I have been brought up in Karasjok. The capital of the sami people they call it (they call Kautokeino that too..., but anyway). I have never experienced the things I saw other people at Isogaisa experienced through shamanism. Sjamanism is the old religion of the sami people, before the christians came and taught us it was sin.
Of course, my childhood consisted f many more supernatural things then maybe children in the citys more south experienced. I have many stories about supernatural things happening to me and my family. My grandad had this foreteller that always came before he himself entered the house. That way my grandmother knew when he was coming. I had a incident with this young crying girl who came to me missing her mother terribly. She had the nicest sami dress on. My mother said it could be a girl who had been taken of the huldra, and they had told her her mother died, when in fact she was taken. When I was a teenager we used to tell fortune in the coffee beans, and we heard many superstistios stories and myths, but we were never allowed to talk about it in the open. I am very sorry to say that my sami religion was very much lacking in my upbringing. When I was a child I heard there was only one sami shaman left. That made me very sad. I thought that this religion was gone already, that there was no way that there could be more sami shamans unless this one shaman would teach someone new to be a shaman. But where would this shaman find anyone to teach? They would be all to busy with work and kids....it has to be someone who is strong and ready for it. Being a shaman is not a easy job... this is what I thought when I was a child. And I remembered I wished that I could be a shaman, except I wasnt ready to commit to it just yet. I wanted to do other things first. I wanted to live life without worries and troubles. This is what I have wanted all my life. Just to live life peacefully without any worries. This is how I look upon my childhood like. There was nothing to fear in the world. Being a shaman means you would have to meet fears of other people and see things that are not always good.
I honestly thought that there where hardly any shamans left. I knew there where people you could see things, and tell the future and heal people, but I didnt know some of them also where shamans. We had learned a bit about shamanism in shcool, and I found it very interesting.
But becomeing an adult, ten years later, I learned that there where alot of shamans! I dont know if they had been there all the time hidden, or what. But suddenly I found myself surrounded by alot of shamans and psychics. Since I was a teenager I have been into alot of diffrent nature religions. Well, first I was christian. I have been baptised and confirmed, but after I went to a christian bording shcool, I found that christianity is not for me. After that I read alot of books on different themes and alternative religions, and found that the nature religions where closest to my heart. I read tarot cards, used pendulants, candles, herbs, arometheraphy and read tons of book from writers mostly from the US. I found most of the religions had too many rules and rituals, and would be just too overtaking of my life.
So now lately I have found back to the religion of my ancestors. When I was younger I didnt feel worthy of it in some way. I didnt feel I was serious and commiting enough for it. That I wasnt enlightened enough to start studying. But now I feel differently. I dont feel any pressure to be or do anything then else than what I can do. I don´t have to do rituals every day, or at all. I can still say that I belong to the old sami culture, and the shamans are the ones who guide me. I know now that there is no other religion in the world that is better for me. There is nothing else that is more right. I am a part of this culture, that is why everything I have experienced of the shaman world seems so right, natural and effortless these last years. It just comes naturally to me.
I got some good advice at the festival this weekend "Dont try, just do". Everytime I have tried to practise anything for people that need proof, or if I do it just to check if it works, or whatever, I have failed. These kind of practises dont work if we "try". They only work when I truly am committed and in it with my heart.
Fredrik and me after the initiation of the drums.
Alot of personal religious stuff here. These are my thoughts after this festival....
At Isogaisa a handicrafter Frederik Prost had a workshop going over the entire weekend where we got to make our own drum. I made one, and it turned out pretty good! :D I am very happy with it. I have been missing one, and been looking for one for a while now, and nor that I got the chance to make my own, I figured that must be it. The first night after starting making it dreamt about the drum. I dreamt that it was the right thing for me and it would help me alot. Now the leather is drying still. In a few days I will be able to try drumming.
The isogaisa dance went really well. We all danced it together on friday and saturday night. Everyone joined in on saturday. It was so much fun! I was very excited too see how it would go, and it went so much better then I had imagened! :D
Dancing the Isogaisa dance
hjemme igjen fra Isogaisa! Så mye nye inntrykk! Helt utrolig bra! :D Takk til alle jeg møtte der! E fortsatt helt ør...